Addicts get triggered more during the holiday seasons, especially Christmas. Since they haven’t resolved any underlying issues that they are abusing drugs and alcohol to escape from, they don’t know how to handle their negative emotions. Even the thought of going through the holiday season is enough to have an addict running to his or her addiction.

How can you, as the friend or spouse of the addict, handle the behavior of the addict during this stressful time? It depends upon where you are in your ability to handle the day-to-day actions of the addict. It will require you to know how to “detach” to a certain degree and keep your focus on things you can control. There are several things you can do to maintain your sanity during this time.

• Keep your expectations realistic. Although the addict may make many promises that he or she will act appropriately and/or not abuse alcohol or drugs, you know from your past that he or she is not always able to keep these promises.
• If you have children at an age where they can understand what is going on (the addiction), you can sit down with them ahead of time and share with them your strategy on how things will be handled if (1) the addict gets drunk or high on drugs; (2) becomes emotionally out-of-control; (3) the addict does not show up at a planned event; (4) or whatever type of behavior is unsuitable to you and your family.
• Strategies: (1) You can advise your addict friend or spouse of your strategy should he end up in one of the above situations; (2) You can have a back-up driver available to drive the addict home; (3) While attending a party or family gathering you can go to a different room than where your friend or spouse is to maintain your calm attitude.
• Decide ahead of time how you will keep yourself calm and collected. Make the decision you will not “react” to the addict’s behavior. Have something planned after the holiday that you want to do and use that event as a focus to keep your thoughts turned toward.

For more information on how to use my Roadmap Out of Addiction to influence the addict as well as take back your life, sign up for my free report on the right.

Wishing you a Merry Christmas!
Kathy